Wednesday, June 27, 2012

The 30+ Sexolution

I’ve noticed a revolution of sorts taking place amongst women of my age group (30+) recently. We are having an increasingly difficult time being the “good girls” that society dictates we should be. Calls for abstinence are being tossed to the wind. Women who were waiting to be intimate with their future husbands have the will to wait no longer. Where the hell are these men; our husbands??? *Shrugs* I have no idea.

However, as one of these women moving into my sexual prime I understand the frustration. I am tired of fighting, stifling, and oppressing this innate desire. This desire was placed in me by my Creator so I will no longer look at it as foreign or wrong. Simply put…Something has got to give. Not only are 30+ women longing for physical intimacy but there is also a focus on developing a REAL connection with a man. FYI, we don’t choose to feel this way in most instances. It is a natural, God given desire placed in us. Call it our biological clocks or whatever you want for that matter. But I am here to tell you that whatever you call it, it is real. If I had my way I would rid myself of these feelings. But since I can’t I will embrace it with both arms.

Ladies, I call on you to embrace this leg of your journey even though it’s frustrating as hell!

And remember your man is on his way!

***Ladies, please feel free to leave a comment sharing whether your sex drive increased after 30 :-)

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Wednesday, June 20, 2012

What I Wish I Would've Known Before Saying "I Do"

It's clear by this country's divorce rate that people are entering unions with a host of misconceptions. Love is not magic, it takes work and lots of it. Lately I've been pondering marriage and what a man/woman should know before making an attempt at the ultimate merger. So this week I asked married and once married folk the question,
"What's one thing you wish you would've known before getting married???"

I hope these answers provide some insight as to what to consider before saying "I Do"

Knowing and doing are two different things... I WISH I would have seen healthier relationships around me coming up. I wish I would have known what they look like -Paulette

That everyday is work; no days off   -Jason

If you had asked me that question 10 years ago I would have said don't get married unless you find a compatible person    -Deb

I wish I had a way of communicating and resolving conflict more effectively   -J.D.

How stubborn my man would be about losing weight. I wish I would have known he was not open to any conversation about getting in shape. I do. He is always dressed nice, haircut and all but refuses to accept any advice getting in shape   -Angel

One thing I wish I would have known before I got married is that no matter how much advice you get on what it takes to be married, or how much you think you know, you just have to learn for yourself and find your own way as a couple. What worked for other couples may not work for you, and that's okay  -Graham

The biggest thing I wish I would have known was the importance of finances. When you get married it is not just your debt its y'all debt. It is not just your income it's y'all income. I think that had I known the importance of finances and how important creating a financial future for not just yourself but your family was I would have began sooner. Many marriages fail due to finances and I am glad my husband and I gained that knowledge together but I wish we would have understood that concept prior to marriage. Many times our parents tell us to go to college to get a great job but they don't tell you how to manage those finances and having to learn that with another individual is a growing process that not all can handle. I am thankful that I found someone who was able to share that new experience with me   -Geneva

Ladies Your Man is Closer Than You Think!!!

Please check out the Wholeness 4 Love blog which follows a woman's journey to wholeness one step at a time...

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Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Letter To My (Future) Wife- A Man's Perspective...

Patience was never one of my virtues, positive attributes or even a want. I wanted what I wanted and I got what I wanted whenever I felt like I needed it. But I was wrong. No one before you was anywhere near what I was looking for, just women I had happened to find along the way to discovering you. It took more time than I was willing to give to understand that I wasn't ready for you when love had found my friends; and though I thought I was the best man out of all of them, I was the best man for all of them. Their wedding days made me wish I had known you sooner. Their corny nights at home made me want to trade my nights on the town for a storm to hold you through in bed. While my hopes sat on the shelf I pursued you until nothing was left but the hope-less romantic trying to see my life as half-full... That is...until I found you. My imaginings of you were nothing like the teenage fantasies I had conjured up. Had you marked in some shade of awesome with curves like the meanest chicanes and eyes the color of spring in full bloom under a new moon. Wanted to tell you the secret lightning bugs had shed light upon while I waited through the night for you to appear. My want for a woman, a companion, was superseded by the belief that perfection could only be personified when my eyes were ready to see the big picture. You- are the one that I've been waiting for. With soft kisses to your chin and my hand in your hair, my love has been waiting for you to change the tune from these celibacy blues to something upbeat, brilliant, and new. I said I would never settle just to settle down and by the way your hand fits in mine and you smile when I do, I know that what I wanted before meeting you wasn't anything close to rational. Who would have ever believed that waiting was worth it?  Those that have found what we have already know. My forever is caught in your eyes and grows in your womb. I know this is love, because I can hear you thinking about me. I can feel your heartbeat when I hold your hand, and every love song I hear makes me want to love you even more than I thought I previously could. Where have you been all my life? That's right.... I wasn't ready for you. Yet my nights will never be lonely and my days will always be bright because when I find you, for real, I know you'll glow when we touch and time will stop when we kiss. Not-so-patiently waiting? No. More like perfecting my life for your immaculate timing.
Love you for who you are-, and who you will be to me.
Ms. Umuch.

- Stacey L. Moor

Ladies Your Man is Much Closer Than You Think!

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